Chaucer pwns Gower
Inspired by Geoffrey Chaucer's impressive pwning of Gower on his blog, and dunechaser's recreation of Chaucer in Lego form, I have recreated the triumph over Gower in Sims2 form.
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Behold Chaucer, respected civil servant, admired poet, master blogger.
Chaucer is a loving husband with a hot wife,
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And a hopeful young son who appears to be growing up well.
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(Apart from that incident on his birthday.)
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In fact, Chaucer is everything that Gower is not.
Gower reads with distaste in the newspaper that in addition to his poetic triumphs, Chaucer has an award-winning blog.
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He stays up late into the night, flaming Chaucer.
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But Chaucer turns Gower's feeble attempts at wit against him, and the bloggers rejoice, and rush to buy Chaucer blog t-shirts.
Gower's thoughts of revenge, thwarted in the literary arena, take a turn.
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Chaucer, blissfully unaware of Gower's mean intentions, strolls past Gower's house one fine morning.
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Gower accosts Chaucer.
Wherefore speken to the hende?
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Other words are exchanged, and Chaucer quits Gower with dignity.
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But he finds it hard to ignore the insult offered him by Gower's infantile poking and shoving. He expresses his fury to his sympathetic wife, Philippa.
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The next morning, Chaucer returns to give Gower his comeuppance.
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And it's on. Gower is prideful and posturing.
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He is no match for Chaucer in any arena: poetry, blogging or ass-kicking.
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Indeed, Chaucer kicks Gower's skinny, unpoetic butt.
I appeale thee John Gowere that thou art a wanker.
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And Gower cries like a little girl.
The end. Except to add, because we know Master Geoffrey will enjoy it, a provocative picture of Katherine Swynford.
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